July 2009 Aims
Posted by Dave in Aims, tags: Aims, barbecue, Nostradamus, predictions, TMWRNJA touch late but I suppose we better check on our aims
Aim One
Aim one is to take a leaf out of Gordon Brown’s book and every time someone tells me “your failing” or “the government is crumbling around you” just stick my fingers in my ears and go “la la la la la I am not listening”
Aim Two
Aim to is to solve the immense heat we are having at the moment by emigrating to the north pole
Aim Three
Aim three is to improve ITV game show “The Chase” by having a pack of savage dogs, and then releasing them every time the smug git of a chaser gets a question wrong and the relish in the fact that he stands no chance of escaping from the hounds!
Aim Four
Aim four is to take all the people making jokes at Michael Jackson’s expense, melt them down and turn them into children’s toys and see how they like it!
Aim Five
Aim five is to make it compulsory that only one celebrity is allowed to die on any one specific day lest they risk being overshadowed by a much bigger celebrity dying!
Given the immense heat I’m sure Nostradamus would love his very own barbecue to cook a variety of undercooked snacks on. Although he may prefer a salad. Let’s see which option it is as we review last month’s predictions
Prediction one was “In a landslide victory, Labour will win every seat up for grabs in the elections”….. errr no Nosty it was quite the opposite… though not bad enough for Gordon Brown to resign… in Gordon Brown’s opinion… the rest of the country aren’t living in denial land!
Prediction two was “A bunch of normal people will be locked in a house together on TV and they will all get on and acomplish any task set of them without failure or argument”… the key word in that prediction (and the reason Nosty got it wrong) was NORMAL. Big Brother housemates are never normal!
Prediction three was “David Thorp will be the only member of the Thorp family to receive a fathers day card from a blood relative”…. and indeed he was. For some inexplicable reason other members didn’t deserve one. Couldn’t be anything to do with the fact they haven’t bothered about their Grandchildren for a year could it?
Here are next months predictions. Two out of three correct will win Nosty a nice shiny barbecue
Prediction One
The temperature in the UK will drop below freezing point at some point this month
Prediction Two
Andy Murray will win the men’s singles at Wimbledon
Prediction Three
The live feed will be restored to big brother just in time for Sophie and Karly lezzing up (I can dream)
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