The Return of Aims
Posted by Dave in Aims, tags: Aims, barbecue, Nostradamus, predictions, TMWRNJGiven the rarity of posts to this blog recently, something needs to be done. So time to resurrect monthly feature where we take a look at our 5 aims for the blog each month, and resident mystic Nostradamus makes some frighteningly accurate predictions for the month ahead. A feature that is in no way a rip off of two features that were on the programme affectionately known as TMWRNJ during the late 90s
So here are our aims for February/March
Aim One
Aim one is to utilise Gordon Brown’s new interest in fisticuffs by settling the UK general election battle between him and David Cameron in the only way possible………. FIIIIIGGGGGHHHHHT!!!
Aim Two
Aim two is to transfer strangely popular (even though its crap but so crap it’s good) gameshow Take Me Out to channel 5 changing the format of the show so each week it features an annoying celebrity who is then “taken out” by members of the public using a vast array of semi-automatic weaponry
Aim Three
Aim three is to take photo’s of all the snow Britain has had this year, post them to anyone going on about how burning fuels creates greenhouse gases and global warming with a caption saying “look how wrong you are”.
Aim Four
Aim four is to punish Ashley Cole for once again making the frankly ludicrous decision to cheat on his wife when his wife is as hot as Cheryl Cole, oddly enough since she is Cheryl Cole, by inviting him to take part in the C5 version of “Take Me Out”, whilst leading him to believe it’s actually the ITV version
Aim Five
Aim five is to solve the big freeze by recycling. Simply take any of the photographs from aim 3 that are left over and then set fire to them providing warmth, and much needed greenhouse gases if the global warming activists are to be believed
He’s been hibernating for the winter but he’s back with his stunningly accurate predictions all in the name of netting him the very special prize should he manage to get two out of three right…. his very own barbecue. So here are his predictions for February/March
Prediction One
Alexander Thorp will receive an invisible card and present from a certain member of his family for his birthday for the third year running
Prediction Two
Ashley Cole will be executed for his crime of cheating on the “nation’s sweetheart”
Prediction Three
Rian from ITV’s “Take Me Out” will be given her own diet series
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